I’m not good enough.
I’ll never earn as much money as I need to.
No one will ever like the real me.
I’m afraid of dying poor.
I’m afraid of looking stupid.
There aren’t enough good jobs to go around.
I have to please people so that they’ll love me.
Sound familiar? These are limiting beliefs and we all have them. They are those nasty little stories we tell ourselves, and we learned some when we were kids from our family, friends, our culture, and our society. Even now, we continue to add to our beliefs, even though we’re unaware of doing it.
But before we can blast them, we have to identify them. So how do we know what our limiting beliefs are?
Fear is a big part of our limiting beliefs. Start with this statement and fill in the blank. “I’m afraid that______.”
Example: I’m afraid that I’ll never get my dream job. Continue this exercise until you have discovered 10 of your most painful beliefs. Consider all the areas of your life, such as finances, romance, social, career, etc.
Now that you have your 10 beliefs written out, write out three to five reasons you believe these. Why do you fear each one? Dig deep here.
Examples: I’m afraid I will never get my dream job. I believe this is true because no one in my family had a real career and they don’t think I will either. I’m sure I didn’t take the right courses in college and that will make it impossible to get the job I want.
I will never be wealthy. I don’t believe I know enough about anything to make money. I believe rich people are dishonest. I believe people would treat me differently if I had money.
Can you see how believing these can affect how you take action on your life? These become not just real fears, but self-fulfilling prophecies.
These beliefs stimulate feelings, which create our actions, and oftentimes this happens so fast we aren’t even aware of it.
BELIEF STIMULUS = FEELING = ACTION = RESULT
Now let’s prove you wrong! Write down evidence that proves each of your statements is actually not true. Start with:
- Is this belief always true for you? Or is it something you’ve just heard from your parents or friends.
- Is it sometimes true for you?
- Is it not really true for you?
- Why or when was it not true for you?
- Where did this belief come from? Your parents? Were they experts? Rely on experts!
Your beliefs should come from your own experiences and from the advice of experts.
#2 Identify the beliefs that are holding you back. Which of these beliefs is having the greatest negative impact on your life? We’ll start with those first.
Examine your most negative belief and think about how your life and behavior would change if that belief were gone. Really think hard on this and consider the change you would experience in your life if you weren’t help back by this belief.
#3 Challenge your limiting beliefs
Write AT LEAST 5 reasons your belief is actually NOT TRUE.
Example: I will never be wealthy. Actually, I don’t believe this is true at all. I don’t believe rich people are all dishonest. I don’t believe my real friends will treat me differently.
I’m afraid I will never get my dream job. I actually believe this is sometimes true because some work I just have to take before my dream job appears. I can take additional courses to make me a great candidate for the career I really want. I was the top of my class and I’m a fast learner so it will be easy for me to learn what I need to know!
Start by forming a new belief in the place of the old one.
I believe that I will have my dream career.
Look for supporting evidence!
The people who told me it’s hard to find my dream career have never tried to achieve one.
I haven’t yet started pursuing my career and just got scared.
I know there are people doing this work and I’m good enough to join them.
Visualize what this belief in your life. When you close your eyes and see this new belief, what do you feel? Where do you feel it in your body?
Find pictures in a magazine or online that reflect your new belief and create a vision board. Write your new belief on your vision board and place all your supporting images and evidence around it.
Look at this twice a day, when you get up and before you go to bed. You can even put this on your phone so you can look at it during the day.
I’d love to hear what you think of this method for blasting your limiting beliefs!